How to Make a Decision: written lovingly by someone who hates making them

There are a couple of big decisions I need to make in my life. To tell you the truth, they have been plaguing me for a long time. Whenever anyone asks me how things are going (especially those who I feel the need to "catch up" with) I ramble on...telling of my latest and greatest train of thought in this dreaded decision-making process. Who knows what I'm even saying? Who cares? If I was to be completely truthful, I would say that my ramblings are just a form of procrastination. The fact that I tell people, "I'm trying to decide..." is just a way of me putting off the actual decision itself.

One of the decisions is whether or not I am going on a mission trip to Columbia. It's coming up very soon, and I feel myself making the decision in a very passive and cowardly way...simply by means of not doing anything. I have not gotten my passport. I have not looked into what shots I need to get. I could not even tell you the dates of the mission trip. I am embarrassed by my lack of action. Looking at myself from the outside, I would love to say that I am a "go-getter," but alas, I am blatantly letting this opportunity pass me by.

I am feeling remorse about this, because I feel like going on a mission trip is something that I do, in fact, want to do. Really! I do! Then why am I not jumping at the chance to go?? It makes no sense.

I can tell you this...I have not been in consistent prayer about this decision. I have not fervently asked God to provide direction or wisdom. I am relying solely on my human ways of reasoning...and look where it's gotten me. My stomach is twisted in knots and I cringe every time someone mentions the word "mission" because I know what I've done...or should I say what I've not done.

So what am I going to do about it? Give myself a swift kick in the butt and take some action!

Step 1: PRAY. Pray that God will zap me with motivation and vigor. Pray that Jesus will help me to not take this life He has given me for granted. Pray that the Holy Spirit will calm my spirit and help me to find my worthiness in Him alone. (If you know me, love me, and see or talk to me, please ask me if I'm doing this!)
Step 2: Fill out the application for a passport that was lovingly placed on our kitchen counter by my oh-so-supportive husband (thank you for pushing me to always be better, Patrick!).
Step 3: TURN IT IN (I suppose I need to figure out where exactly to turn it in to...) This way there will be one less excuse next time a mission opportunity comes up. Sneaky, sneaky...
Step 4: Write down the reasons why I want to go on a mission trip. This way they will be more tangible to me, versus something I just say to make myself feel like a better human being.

Ok, I better stop there. I get overwhelmed with long lists of tasks way too easily.

If I was a friend of myself and I came to myself for advice on making this decision. I would say this, "Take tangible steps of action, as if you have made the decision one way or the other. Pray for God to raise up red flags if it is the wrong decision, and for Him to clear the path of obstacles if it is the right decision. The worst thing you could do is to do nothing."

Now to attempt to take my own advice.

Moral of the Story: Don't wallow in what you haven't done. Pray to the God who loves you despite and because of everything. And for God's sake...take action!

Follow-UP

I posted a while back on a fab brand of products for the ladies...ahem...if you know what I mean (hey now, keep it clean!). A friend just shared this link with me so I had to post! I got a laugh out of it and I hope you do too. Enjoy!

Moral of the Story: Laughter is always right on time.

Sunny Friday

Today was such a gorgeous day, I have to tell ya'll about it. We have these two hand-made (by my husband, I must say!) adirondack chairs in our front yard that are perfect for lounging as our neighbors stroll by on the sidewalk out front.

Our charming adirondack chairs, made by Patrick and painted to match our front door!

I love chilling there and saying hi and just getting to know the people in our neighborhood. Well today, my hubby put up a little table for me out there, allowing me to actually work in that glorious spot. I kicked butt on some graphic design freelance while he was working away in "the shop" (aka our garage) on some more fabulous wood projects. He's really amazing when it comes to that stuff!

All the while the sun is shining, the birds are chirping, the leaves are changing. I was completely content. And now tonight we are off to a Member Preview of the newest show at the Brooks Art Museum in downtown Memphis: Armed + Dangerous. It's a show all about the transformation of armor through the years. And get this...entertainment provided by Dueling Dragons School of Fencing...how cool is that?! I can't wait to watch my first fencing duel! I hope your Friday is just as lovely as mine is turning out to be!

Moral of the Story: Keep your eyes open, as you just never know when your day is going to become lovely!

One Word Wednesday

Newlyweds.

The Doubt Monster

It's baaaaaaaaaack...

Here I am, minding my own business, trying to expand my graphic design horizons by updating my portfolio, resume, etc. All of a sudden, as I'm looking through my portfolio, I hear this voice inside my head say, "You don't have anything in here that challenges the norm. Everything in this portfolio is 'safe.' No graphic design firm in their right mind is going to be impressed with your work." I know it's harsh, but it's seriously the exact words that I heard just a moment ago! How does this happen? And what is IT?!

I call it the Doubt Monster. Dun, dun, dun. it creeps up as soon as you begin to do something in your life that could actually be great. It makes you feel like you are nothing. And the sad part is, a lot of the times, I believe it! The Doubt Monster and I have a hate hate relationship. It hates me and I hate it. I've always struggled with self-confidence. I was hoping that in life you get to a certain point where you just believe in yourself. No questions asked. You're awesome in your own mind and no one can stop you. I look around, and it sure seems like other people are to this glorious point....but not this girl.

Is that really true, though? Is anyone to the point where they never doubt themselves? The more that I think about it, the more that I believe everyone struggles with doubting themselves at certain points. It's called sin, the Devil and the fallen world around us. I know it sounds Debby Downer, but you gotta trust me on this one. It's good stuff. I just had a revelation that all of this is because of the whole Adam and Eve eating the apple in the Garden of Eden thing (Genesis 2:15-17, 22-25, Genesis 3:1-10). We as humans are now born with capabilities of doing "bad" things...aka sin...aka doubting ourselves and how we were made. We don't just automatically pop out of our mother's wombs thinking happy confident thoughts and expecting the same of the world around us. Think about it. As soon as Adam and Eve were aware of the knowledge of good and evil, they felt the need to cover themselves. They were embarrassed. They doubted themselves. Before they ate that apple, they knew their Maker and had full confidence in themselves and their purpose in life. It's like we're Adam and Eve and we're constantly battling that feeling of wanting to hide...feeling like we're not good enough.

Now here's where it hopefully all starts making sense. When I start doubting myself it's like a terrible downward spiral. I doubt myself, feel bad about myself, realize I'm doubting myself, and then feel bad that I'm doubting myself...you get the picture...bad, bad, bad. Instead of letting the doubt control me, I need to realize this: There is sin and doubt in the world. Every one of us experiences it (even those who appear to not!). We cannot stop what we are doing and become discouraged when we experience this doubt. We have to rise above it, knowing that God made us exactly this way for a reason. Because Jesus suffered and died in our place, sealing our victory OVER sin, we are now perfect in God's eyes. I AM awesome and the only thing that can come between me and realizing God's full potential for me is, well... ME. Basically, I need to get out of the way and trust my Creator. I am beautiful. I am wonderful. I AM a great graphic designer! And I can do anything I put my mind to.

So, take that, Doubt Monster! You have no reign in my life. That's God's place and there's no room for you here!

Moral of the Story: You will more than likely experience doubt in your life. But don't let it rule your life. Every time the Doubt Monster comes around, you can confidently push it aside, because God made you and God loves you...just the way you are.

Lucy! You're Home!!!

Meet Lucy, the newest member of the Taylor family :D

She's just too cute to have a small picture!

Yes folks, that's right! Patrick and I just adopted/rescued our first puppy!
And here's how the story goes:

Ever since we long-term dog sat for our friends Katie and Mark we knew that we just had to have our own bundle of love; it was just a matter of time. Early last week we got an email from our friend, Kim, notifying us that a friend of a friend had found four puppies on her doorstep when she went to get the mail in the morning. Talk about a surprise that could rock your world! She graciously took them in to try and find all of them homes. Well, come to find out, there were actually three more puppies found in the field behind her house! Luckily her neighbor took on finding homes for the additional cuties. (I just have to give props to both of these amazing families. I'm so thankful that they had the means to find proper homes for the sweet little darlings...what a task!) So just to recap, SEVEN puppies total were found...one male and six females. As soon as I got the email, I forwarded it to P, and we took a look at the good ole' Taylor budget to make sure we weren't crazy to possibly take this on. We knew it would be a big financial commitment. In addition to making sure we were in a good place financially, we also had to consider the time and energy we knew it would take to properly care for a pet...especially a puppy pet! I knew it would be totally different from when my family had a dog growing up. This time I would be the one to feed, walk and clean up after our new furry friend. Another piece of the puzzle was that the puppies were found in Hernando, MS, which is about 50 minutes away from where we live. We're not just talking a quick trip...it would be more like a hefty jaunt. We had to make sure this feeling wasn't just a whim. After what seemed like forever, we finally decided to go "take a look" (haha...as if that's ever all we were going to do!) I called Deanne (who found the puppies) and told her we were on our way! She let us know that there were only two puppies left (both girls) out of the seven. Wow! That's awesome that five of the puppies had already found homes! (And now that I'm looking back on it, I'm really really glad, because it was hard enough just choosing between two!)

We had so much fun meeting both puppies and talking with Deanne about their personalities, mannerisms, etc. Like I said, it was SO hard to choose between the two sisters. Let alone leave one behind :( And if you know me at all, you know how much trouble I have with decisions... we actually got to the point where we literally had to stop and pray that God would give us peace and direction towards which puppy to choose! (it sounds silly...but I'm learning more and more about the power of prayer...even for "simple" things)

Here's Patrick with Lucy's sister...see what trouble we had?

We chose our little grey love muffin (I know, I know...gag!) because of her sleek/slender frame and spunky personality. Between the two, she definitely took on the dominant role when they were playing. Although now that she's in a new environment she is very timid. Gradually we see her building confidence, though, and it's super fun! Another reason we fell in love with her was her unique coloring. I always pictured us with a red haired dog (go figure), but now that we have her I can't wait to watch her grow into a beautiful adult dog. It's like a fun story that we don't know the ending to, and I just love surprises!

Our happy family :)

As far as her name goes, we tested out a few other options before we landed on "Lucy." We knew we wanted a people name. After all, it'd have to hold a candle to our cat's name, "Moses," so it was only fair. Our friend, Katie, suggested the name "Lucy" after she met her that first night we brought her home. Oddly enough, Patrick confessed that when he saw a picture of her, that very name had popped into his head. It also just so happened that the day after we got her would have been Lucille Ball's 100th birthday!! And seriously, who wouldn't want to be able to say, "Lucy, you got some 'splainin' to do!" to lighten the mood after one of the inevitable "puppicidents" we're going to have, right?!

Welcome home, Lucy! We're delighted you're finally here!

PS: She's having a puppy dream as I'm writing this blog...go get'em, girl!
PPS: I talked to Deanne today and she loves the name we chose. She also let us know that Lucy's sister was able to find a forever home on Saturday. Get this: the family that adopted her sister had a little boy and girl. When Deanne said, "Are you going to love your new little puppy?" the little girl responded, "I already do love her!" My feelings exactly!

Moral of the Story: Good things are definitely worth waiting for.

Unexpected Kindness

Patrick and I recently celebrated our One Year Anniversary...Yay Marriage!! You can see the happy couple below:

Happy Birthday to our Marriage!

We celebrated at the lovely Historic Fairview Inn in Jackson, MS (thanks to Living Social Escapes) with a romantic weekend just far enough away from the business of life. I do hope to go back again. But then again, who wouldn't after feeling like a Queen for a weekend?!

On the way back from our celebration Patrick was driving and I was trying to get comfortable in the passenger seat, but it just wasn't working. Something was missing...and it just so happened that the missing piece was a pillow in the trunk of our car. So, Patrick, being the knight in shining armor that he is, pulled the car to the side of the road to get it for me. The road we had stopped on was one of those "Highway" roads that are two lanes with a 55 mph speed limit. Luckily it wasn't too busy...otherwise I don't think I would've let him get out...no matter how uncomfortable I was! Not 5 seconds after we stopped, another car pulled up behind us. Now, I'm not going to lie, my gut reaction was, "Oh no! What do they want!" I guess that's just the world we live in today...with all the bad news I hear on the radio. Quite the contrary, though! He was a Southern Gentleman, and he wanted to see if we needed any help! I was astonished! And then I felt really bad because A#1) I had jumped to the conclusion that he was somehow out to get us; and B#2) His stop was in vain, because we were simply a doting husband getting a pillow out of the trunk of our car for an "on the verge" cranky wife!

His unexpected kindness was a breath of fresh air, to say the least. Honestly, it made me wish I was a big, burly, man for a second, so that I could stop on the side of the road to see if a weary traveler needed help. Thanks, Richard, for stopping to help us!! And thanks for re-instating my confidence that there are indeed kindred spirits all around us.

Moral of the Story: Look for the best in those around you and you just might find that it's right there in front of your face...even when you least expect it!